The all-important Why

9 of life. It is based on the fact that there have been times during my life where I was in desperate need of consolation myself. Times when I did not receive any myself. Let me start at the beginning. I was 38 years old at that time and the year was 1978. I still remember clearly how it feels to be young. We were so energetic, optimistic and unaware. We were healthy, our children and ourselves. We were building and we established a large garden. It was simply wonderful and everything seemed to be so self-evident: Family, job, property, success, friends… Yes, and then came the moment, out of the blue, when I stood next to a coffin. My most beloved was lying in this coffin, pale and silent. No power in the world could wake him up and make him breathe again. He was simply dead, conclusively dead. What a shock! I no longer understood the world… * A place was now irrevocably empty! But life had to go on. And it did go on. But there was a deep wound inside of me and perplexity. Why was all of this like that? How could a young life come to such an abrupt end? I was naturally aware that such things happened to others, but only from a distance. But this here? I now found myself in the middle of suffering and disconsolation. But whilst I “functioned” in my daily life, the great questioning and search began. It doggedly stirred inside of me, over and over and this for many years. It was the question about the meaning of our life, it was also “The all-important Why”. What was it all in aide of I thought: This being born and then to die? And what we call “life” lies in between. But what kind of life is it? A small section of mankind has a more or less good life, but most people by far live in hardship and poverty, with diseases and exploitation. Other questions were added later: Why is it that children are born already ill and handicapped? Why must some people walk around with an ugly face all their life? Why must this mother die before her little children?